Shoken Ad

the one who dwells forever

It was a normal Monday peer group, special in and of itself, a monthly gathering of others from my spiritual companioning training program who have chosen to continue meeting long after we finished our program together. I think it is most simple to say that we love each other deeply and the space we have created is one filled with support and honesty and friendship. This month, one of us was sharing something of her own practice, a small group she holds every week. She, who has educated others in the beauty of the Torah for many years, showed us what it is like to be in the space she creates for her community. She started by explaining the meaning of the words we would be meditating with that day,

Shoken - the one who dwells/abides/is present

Ad - in eternity/forever/until

and invited us to consider what within us resonated with those words.

Let me take a moment to step back and explain something. I don’t often think of what will happen to my soul after death, but when I do, I find that I expect it to do the same thing my physical body will do, decompose and become compost for new things… trees, animals, minerals, air… wherever that soul stuff is needed at that moment. I do not imagine the “me” as I know myself to go on. I honestly can’t see how that is possible. Who I am is an embodied individual and the experiences I have shape both my soul and my body. My body and soul are the same thing. I cannot see them separately.

So when I sat in reflection with the words the one who dwells forever, I was not expecting what surfaced. I sensed this presence within me, comingled with my soul body. Fully me but also more. It was this moment of, well, transcendence. I’ll share what I wrote during that quiet moment.

It is ancient.

I always imagined my soul started with me, but I can feel her age now. She is me but she is also more in some way I do not fully understand.

How could I not have ever noticed her before?

I thought she would end with me, dissipate into the ether to become parts of new things. And, yes, some of my soul will… but not her.

I feel so small.

I am unable to do the experience justice using words and while I have a clear image of it, I do not know how to translate it into a painting. Perhaps if I were more skilled, I could use the soft edges of watercolor and clear lines of ink to capture the essence. I tried writing a poem about it but stopped partway through. It was so insufficient! I suppose the fullness of the experience will have to remain solely with me.

However, I encourage you to sit with the words Shoken Ad, whatever that may mean for you. Take that meaning deep down and notice what rises within you to greet it. It doesn’t have to be positive or look anything like what I shared here. There is no correct response, we are simply noticing. Sit with what rises, letting go of any need to explain it, fix it, or justify it. Allow it to be what it is. Even if what it is… is uncomfortable.

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I would love to companion more people! Consider booking a session:

Spiritual companioning is a supportive, non-religious space to explore what gives your life meaning and grounding.
It’s a conversation-based practice where you’re invited to slow down, pay attention to your inner life, and notice what feels true, steady, or alive for you. You don’t need any particular beliefs. My role is simply to listen with care, ask thoughtful questions, and help you make sense of your own experience. It’s a space for reflection, curiosity, and discovering your own path

Wildbody companioning is a supportive, body-centered practice that helps you gently re-friend your body.
It’s a space to slow down and notice what’s happening inside you without judgement, your sensations, tension, ease, or fatigue. There’s no agenda and nothing you have to fix. My role is to offer grounded presence, simple prompts, and curiosity so you can reconnect with your body in a way that feels safe and doable. It’s about rebuilding trust with yourself, learning your own signals, and finding a more compassionate way of being in your body.